Martin Ferguson rebuffs Coal CEO Twiggy Palmcock in launching Energy paper

While Federal Resources and Energy minister Martin Ferguson was launching a white paper on energy, the press conference was interrupted by that scallywag Victorian Coal CEO Twiggy Palmcock who thanked the Minister for his support of the fossil fuel industry.

"I'd just like to say thank you Mr Ferguson, for being an excellent puppet for the fossil fuel industry. And I'd also like to say thank you on behalf of Twiggy Palmcock of Excretum Mining - my good self, and my friends Gina and other allies." announced Twiggy.

"We are very happy to have you representing our interests. Thank you Mr Ferguson for helping regional communities drink water and coal from the same tap. It's a marvellous outcome for all our regional communities in this situation. That they can now drink gas from the taps as well. Thank you very much Mr Ferguson" said Twiggy Palmcock, CEO of Excretum Mining.

Related: 2012 Energy white paper | RenewEconomy: Ferguson spies a green energy future … and steps on the gas | The Conversation: Energy White Paper plans to burn, burn, burn it all | A tale of two energy visions: China and Australia | Tony Abbott rebuffs Victorian coal mining magnate

Tony Abbott rebuffs Victorian coal mining magnate Twiggy Palmcock

Did you hear that Tony Abbott got heckled at Melbourne University the other day during his red tape speech? Actually it was just two young coal businessmen keen to meet their hero! Yes, Victorian mining magnate Twiggy Palmcock, CEO of Excretum Mining and sidekick Michael Higgins Beaumont, founder of Australia's Young Coal Champions, who were both keen to meet their hero and leader of the Liberal Party .

They attended the Secure the Future Conference to thank Tony Abbott personally for his "unwavering support of the fossil fuel industry".

They explain in this video how they just wanted to say "Thank you Tony" and urge him to encourage exploitation of Victoria's low grade brown coal and continue the massive tax subsidies for fossil fuel companies to keep them competitive with the upstart renewable technologies of solar and wind power.

"Because as we all know and as Tony has told us Climate change is a conspiracy theory invented by German zoo keepers to bring attention to their celebrity polar bears." said Twiggy.